Hi all,
My name is Minimus. I go by that name because I have a smaller penis than Xavior, which is pretty small because he's asian. I usually consider myself to be African American, even though I'm paler than Anton in winter. I like long walks on the beach but only when I find cool stuff, otherwise, it's a complete waste of time that I could have better used surfing porn or playing warcraft. My idol is Charlie Sheen, what a man! A man man man! Sometimes I like to siphon gas out of people's cars and mix it with vodka. Then I add some red bull, and it will really give you wings. It's like better than coke and 4 loko. So, if you're interested in chubby fat dudes, let me know, and we can work something out. I only date rich women, so if you make less than half a mil per year, don't even bother. Also, you have to be really hot. And I mean really hot, like Ranger in drag hot with the beard and everything. Back hair is a plus, but not required. You also must have at least 3 testicles, and they must be purple, or orange, or any combination of those, unless it's rainbow colored then it would just be gay. I also enjoy early morning tea bagging (catcher, not pitcher), and absolutely crave hot coffee in my butt hole. Well, that's about it, you all know me now.
